devoir d'anglais

bonjour j'ai un devoir d'anglais où je dois raconter mes vacances en austalie, j'aimerais savoir si j'ai fais des fautes et lesquelles, merci de votre aide! :)

Hey guy,
How are you?
I'm so impatient to see you next saturday! I can't wait to tell you my incredible holiday, I was gone with my family is Australia, the 6th biggest country in the world! during the first days of our trip we had visited Sydney, a city with a very intense cultural life! We had assisted to a fabulous concert at the opera house of Sydney (even i don't like classic music it was so great and impressive you can't imagine!) visited a lot museum and discovered to the immense Barrier rief : this is like the paradise on earth.
Next weeks we had spend the road to the outback of Australia, it had been very contrasting, excepted some farmer , we had seen not a lot of people, the landscape are very tough (desert, Ayers Rock..) and the climat was more agressive.
We spend the last days of our trip at Aboriginal people camp, they were so nice, we were so touched of her natural generosity! The Aboroginal people take a simple life : they are nomadic and almost naked and barefoot, they are live by hunting, fishing, gathering, foraging with simple tools.
They are litteraly in harmony with nature, the chief of tribe had tried to teach how to hunt at my father but it was not brillant.. Had had almost been stung by a poisonous snake (this make me laughed a lot but fortunately the chief was vigilant!) It's right Australia can be a paradise with beautiful landscape and funny animals like kangaroos and koalas as the outback Australia can be a terrify hell for careless tourist like our!
In the sunset of last day with the aboriginal campfire , Moodoo the chief told the story about Aboriginal People : The "Dreamtime" and ancestral legends, and more recently during the 20th century whenthe Aborigines were compelled to forsale their heritage and assimilate for the most part of us. The Aborigines were happy before the arrival of British soldier, he denounce the whole process of the British colonisation. when the Britsh arrived they tried to impose their culture (customs, religion, economic systems, language) . It's only in the 70' british regognized the protect their aboriginal way of life. It was so sad. But after this moment, we ad eaten excellent traditional food and a young gir, Loona, teached the art of tatto, we have sung and danced all the night!
It was very different with our europeen way of life : we are preoccuped all the time about superficial things and problem and Aboriginal got nothing but they are happy.. We were so sad to left him.
This trip make me change and allowed me to discover a lot people and culture. So, and you? Tell me your trip in Amsterdam , it must be certainly so funny, isn't it? ;) I hope you brought back a little present!

Ben,
See you soon!
XXX

Hey guy,
How are you?
I can't wait to see you next saturday! I can't wait to tell you my incredible holidays, I went with my family in Australia, the 6th biggest country in the world! during the first days of our trip we had visited Sydney, a city with a very intense cultural life! We had assisted to a fabulous concert at the opera house of Sydney (even if i don't like classic music it was so great and impressive you can't imagine!), we visited a lot of museum and discovered to the immense Barrier rief : this is like the paradise on earth.
Next weeks we had spent our time in the outback of Australia, it was very contrasting, excepted some farmers , we had not seen a lot of people, the landscape is very tough (desert, Ayers Rock..) and the climat was more agressive.
We spent the last days of our trip at Aboriginal people camp, they were so nice, we were so touched of their natural generosity! The Aboroginal people have a simple life : they are nomadic and almost naked and barefoot, they are living by hunting, fishing, gathering, foraging with simple tools.
They are litteraly in harmony with nature, the chief of tribe had tried to teach how to hunt to my father but it was not brillant.. He had almost been stung by a poisonous snake (this make me laughed a lot but fortunately the chief was vigilant!) It's right Australia can be a paradise with beautiful landscapes and funny animals like kangaroos and koalas as the outback Australia can be terriyfing as hell for careless tourists like us!
In the sunset of the last day with the aboriginal campfire , Moodoo the chief told us the story about Aboriginal People : The "Dreamtime" and ancestral legends, and more recently during the 20th century when the Aborigines were compelled to forsale their heritage and assimilate for the most part of them. The Aborigines were happy before the arrival of British soldiers, he denounced the whole process of the British colonization. when the Britsh arrived they tried to impose their culture (customs, religion, economic system, language) . It's only in the 70' that british regognized their aboriginal way of life. It was so sad. But after this moment, we ate an excellent traditional food and a young gir, Loona, teached the art of tattoo, we sang and danced all night!
It was very different with our europeen way of life : we are busy all the time about superficial things and problems and Aboriginals have nothing but though, they are happy.. We were so sad to left them.
This trip makes me change and allows me to discover a lot of different people and culture. And what about you? Tell me about your trip in Amsterdam , it might be certainly so funny, isn't it? ;) I hope you brought back a little present!

Ben,
See you soon!
XXX



Bien dans l'ensemble, mais attention aux temps : prétérit pour raconter des faits datés, passés (comme c'est le cas ici) et non du past perfect comme tu l'as mis ! ;-)